For me depression is like a roller coaster; some times I’m not sad, but I’m still breaking. There is always a storm I’m trying to fight through, but I hide it so no one else is in pain.
On the better days I feel numb, but numb feels worse than pain because I feel like I’m drowning. I stopped blogging to try to help find myself, but in the end all I did was make it worse by trapping my feelings in my mind.
The are always people who don’t understand my depression, but they don’t understand saying harsh things makes it worse. Some family members think it’s just a phase and I’m overreacting.
Those are the people that throw me into having panic attacks again. I feel like one person against a whole dark world.
The only thing I can do is continue to try and push past these walls that are keeping me trapped. I know this war will eventually end and I will have peace, but I also know I have to continue to fight for that to happen.
To anyone struggling like I am,
We are all fighting battles together and staying strong is the only thing we can do to fight back. Please don’t ever think you are alone. In the end we will end up the strongest people.
P.S.A. I decided to write this not for pity, but for the people who are in the same place as me and need words of encouragement.